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Las Vegas, Nevada, United States
"No, really!"

My Favorite Bit of Paper Cup Philosophy

The Way I See It #76

The irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating - in work, in play, in love. The act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. To commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Tools of the Trade and Don't Try to Put Anything Over on Me

Well, I'm only just feeling sturdy enough to say it out loud or let the words see the light of day, but it appears I may - may - have some success at making something from fabric, thread, yarn, trim, glue and more. The fabric is laid out on the dining table, in an array that means something to me. The black cat has left some fur on the light fabric and the white cat on the dark fabric, but I have a lint roller and a washing machine. What will my project be?
I'd printed free patterns, transferred them to freezer paper, lined up supplies, eyeballed fabric in several different light conditions . . . uh-oh. There's something was missing, and there's no substitute for it. I've done this before! I cruised on over to eBay and got a fantastic deal, so I decided to e-mail Girlfriend to learn her color favorites and to tease her a little. Girlfriend can be both whimsical and serious. E-mail, after all, is just black print against a white screen. She can't see my face to see what I've got going on. She sent back a well-considered list of colors she finds beautiful, information I really do need. But she hadn't nibbled about my eBay purchase. I tweaked her interest a little. "OK, what'd you get for your project? I can't imagine what it is!" "Scissors, tweezers, scalpels, retractors, hemostats, and skin hooks." Now, have I said Girlfriend is pretty sharp? Came the next e-mail: "Sounds like you're working with something very small and tight, like jewelry, maybe?" Can't put a whole lot over on Girlfriend.

If you heard a loud noise this morning as the sun rose, it was the breakup of the log jam of creative constipation. For you see, yesterday my diabolical instruments arrived in the mail. This morning I cut, chopped, measured, argued with the instructions and did it my own way, and . . . I am making dolls. Lots and lots of different kinds of dolls ~ I own every material in the world, so the possibilities are endless. My first act was to run the rotary cutter across the finger next to the thumb that last saw the rotary cutter, but I'm intrepid. As I sat with my coffee, working, I began a running list of things I might need to buy, measurements to confirm, methods/techniques to test. I dreamed and mused and pondered and realized that while I may have a deficit of "deliver it up", I certainly have no shortage of brilliant ideas. The colors and patterns and shapes dazzled me, the cats kept me company at my feet. Not an hour had passed before I recalled what a deft hand I am at wielding the skin hook and the hemostat. Turning little dolly legs and arms out is pretty tight work! And I was loving it.

Not a woman to do things one at a time, I'd been giving some thought to a subject. I spoke with each and every doctor who all replied, "Yes, within limits." Then friend Tag threw down the gauntlet and got himself employed! Yes, friends, it is time for me to get a job, for more reasons than simply money. Oh, I am not up for a big career. But I'd welcome a little job. I always have a few different resumes on hand, so I can use the one appropriate to what I'm seeking - non-profit groups, labor, etc. And now I even have a dummied down resume so I won't frighten away potential employers who might wonder, "Did she even read the advertisement?" Friend Cramcake provided me with 4 wonderful recycled cover letters because I didn't feel like composing one from scratch. Yes, that's unusual for me. I was ready to rock the job market now!

I was up before the chickens and I went online to several possible treasure chests. I know the ropes, you see. I was having a ball, watching the jobs post in real time and landing my resume - boom! - in seconds. By late morning I'd responded to 10 reasonable ads. There have been a number of swift replies. I'm dumping "internet mystery shopper". I'm not very big and I do like to shop, but I don't think I can fit in the internet and I surely couldn't squeeze out with my purchases! No portal is that big. Nope ~ not interested in telemarketing. Not bilingual. Can't dance and too fat to fly. I spoke with representatives from 2 well-known and respected legitimate Las Vegas businesses. But imagine my delight to be well employed (at least for a woman who supplements with a monthly pension) by 12:31 p.m.! Read it and weep, readers ~ it's worth it, even though it runs long. This is an actual cut and paste from my confirmation e-mail. Please be sure to let me know what you think - - congratulations are in order. I wonder if Tag did as well.

Hello Leslie Morgan,
Thank you for your response to my advert on ______ .
Presently, the local position available is Personal Assistant / Secretary. I think you will be well-suited for this position. As a private on line-software technician, my business requires I make lots of business trips within and outside the country. My work is essentially on line-related though I have a functional office in Annapolis, MD. I install advanced computer software and security for individuals and small scale organizations. I require a resourceful and hard-working Personal Assistant / Secretary to assist me run my business office from her/his location online. Work description is essentially to reply emails, make phone calls [when necessary], printing and copying documents, banking and bill payment. My Company name, which is presently being registered, is ______ .
Job description:
You will be required to edit, print and copy documents. When I'm out of location with limited access to the Internet, you will reply my emails as I'll instruct you. Again, if I'm out of the country on business, my calls will be forwarded to you. You will advise clients that I'm not available and to leave a message. As a growing business, I wouldn't want clients to think I can be unreachable sometimes. I may have to get you a business number later. Finally, you will do simple banking and bill payment. You will receive payments from my clients, mostly in Checks. Some of the payments I will require that you deposit into my personal bank account. If I require some bills or expenses to be taken of, I will ask some clients to make out the Checks in your name...which you will process at your bank...and then pay the bills or take care of the expenses on my behalf. I'll always provide details and very clear instructions. Your Internet bills and Phone charges arising from making calls on behalf of my business will be my responsibility. This job's only requirement is that you have a computer, Internet connection and a valid phone number. This is ideal for everybody...those working from home, students, the unemployed, business owners and the employed seeking to make an extra income. It's simple and rewarding and you can start right away.
I will pay you $650 every week, making a monthly total of$2600. Additionally, you will be paid a transport allowance of $250 every time I need you to deposit checks into my bank account or process a payment at your bank for the payment of a bill or expense. I estimate two [2] banking activities weekly and so you should get $500transport allowance weekly. Computation of your pay starts from the moment you receive the first Check.
Confirm your acceptance of the above job terms by re-sending your current contact address [not PO Box] and phone numbers. There are assignments to be taken care of right away and urgent bills to be paid. If I receive your confirmation as requested above, a customer will be asked to mail a payment to you soon made out in your name. I will notify you after the payment is mailed and advise you further.
I look forward to working with you.


In my ears right now: An ode to a cut finger. Oops, I did it again.

Something that did not charm me: I do not appreciate attempts to scam me. What if I were stupid or unaware? What if I were so desperate I just jumped? I wonder how many nice people they "take". It makes me furrow my brow.


  1. There are so many scams like that. I never trust anything that sounds a little weird like that.


  2. @ Joyful ~ "If it's too good to be true.. . ", eh? Thank you so much for coming by!

  3. I think most people would tremble when they read, "your bank account. I know I did.

  4. slick, very, very, slick. i've been privy to more hustles and scams since i've lived in vegas than in the sum total of the rest of my life, a considerable number of years. good grief.
    i'm waiting for photos of your creations *insert tapping foot here*.

  5. Nice that they will "always provide details and very clear instructions" of how to bleed you dry!

    I like the shape of the dolls you're making - would like to see the fabric prints a little closer (I like patterns and prints). I find crafts really relaxing - though I am not organised (thet translates as extremely messy). You see so very organised - aside from trying to sever your finger! Think i'll stick with the scissors!

    I see you as a private eye, by the way!

  6. @ Kassie ~ The actual first words that got me were these: "I may have to get you a business number later." Uh, yep. You may need to kiss my butt later, Jack. But, as you suggest, "your bank account" also strikes terror, because I have already been hit in that way, too.

  7. @ rraine ~ Oh, you are spot-on! Even though this was online and "Las Vegas" was apropos of nothing, per se, I've been had and nearly-had here a LOT. Has anyone ever heard me say this is a bad place? :~{

    More commentary to your comment below.

  8. @ Rachel ~ Shite, they'll come into the room right through the monitor and suck you dry. Really.

    More on the dolls below, but your seeing me as a private eye is self-absorbedly fascinating. I'm not so sure what you mean by that. Oh, yes, I'd like to LOOK like Honey West or a Bond girl - I've always been too short, not chesty or narrow enough - but, hmmm . . . I'd love to know what/why you meant.

    More commentary to your comment below.

  9. @ Anyone/everyone - OK, you ALL tickled me, so here it is. The pattern you see for a little primitive doll pleased me because she is so easy to make, not difficult to turn her limbs, and the variations are endless. Her "dress" is simply a long rectangle of fabric(s). She has an enormous head, but is otherwise proportionate.

    You shall ALL be pleased at close-up views, but here's what you have now. This little chiquita is my prototype, but soon I hope to be able to say "Order away ~ No charge!" But this one, follow me, please - is "Kass Goes to the Opera". Why is she first? I knew her best! SO, her dress is gold/white tulle on the bodice, harlequin multi-color in the skirt, and I cannot WAIT for you to see her hair. I've got stuff to replicate those beautiful eyes, oh ~ am I havin' FUN!

    Yes, I shall zoom in (photographically) as I can, though that is not what I "do". I'll try. I'd even mail fabric cuttings. Or ask someone to help me.

  10. @ Everyone who wanted to see the fabrics a little better ~ just click on the images. You'll get closer. I'm in LOVE with the beautiful hand-dyed fabrics!

  11. I don't know if I've mentioned that Shari is also doing "prim" and has a shop on Etsy called "Wild Alice Dreams". no more cutting of fingers please, it makes typing difficult.

  12. @ Tag ~ Well, knock me over with a feather! I've seen Wild Alice Dreams on your blog for a long time. I just never knew that was Shari. I feel kind of thick-headed. I'll go now to look at her offerings.

    Hopefully, I won't cut anything else. I can't afford the blood loss!

  13. "make out the checks in your own name...which you will process at your bank"

    "a lot of business trips within and outside the country"

    I don't know about within the country, but outside could very well be Switzerland.

  14. @ Kirk ~ Or someplace we can't pronounce and don't know where to locate! Geez. But the pay is pretty good, don't you think?

  15. Yes the cheques in your name and you pay bills and expences alarmed me ....can't wait to see the little darlings you are making ...go Leslie !!!....(But PLEASE mind your fingers those Rotary cutters are evil)

  16. @ Artymess ~ Yes, I'm really that stupid, right?

    Lorna, I have a little doll in the making that will make you smile, I think (hope). I am GOING!

    Have you ever caught on commentary that my people are from Blaneau Ffestiniog? Only 3 genereatons past? I have stood on the hilltop cemetary . . . well. I'm very Welsh, due to the efforts of both grandfather and father. Cymru!

  17. Hey Leslie there's NO WAY you could be that stupid if you're Welsh......you would be called TWP but we only call the English that he he ..i love it that you're Welsh it's made my day !!!...Cymru am Byth ...xx

  18. @ Lorna ~ Cymru am Byth! Northern Wales kicks ASS! I wasn't sure you'd ever caught that from my comments anywhere. Gonna go on holiday to Betws Y Coed. ;~} I ain't English!

  19. South Wales kicks ass too ....I knew there was a magical connection I should have known it was Celtic......xx

  20. @ Artymess ~ Darlin', YES - anything Wales kicks butt. Isn't it funny that that was our connection? Of course, it would be! I was chuckling over our earlier e-mail and my friend said, "Well, you're all English, right?" Me: "ENGLISH????!!!" No one gets it who is not Welsh! Love ya, Lorna. got a little dolly going in your image. <3 <3

  21. Can't wait to see that little Welsh doll with the purple hair ...xxx

  22. ~ Artymess ~ Yes, I bought a little tiny thing today that will contribute to the hair - you shall be a very pleased teacher with me, the eternal student.

  23. Wow, I've never seen that con. That is actually a clever one.

    I've often thought if people like that used their powers for good and not evil the world would be a wonderful place!

    Love you're getting all creative.

    Hope you don't have to give it up when you start your new job! ;-0

  24. @ Jenny ~ Oh, very good, my "new job". ;~} Few things make me go off like the crabby old lady I am than all this harmful nonsense we have to watch out for. It saddens me that "they" have time to cook it up, because I barely have time to defend myself against it. Idiots!

    I'm loving getting back to my creativity. I've missed it for a few years. I'm rusty in some of my skills set, but mostly I'm pretty crafty and figure something out. It is very good for me. It makes me feel good about myself. A rarity.

  25. I know what you mean about getting back to creativity. I've been lamenting lately that the IT / helpdesk sort of stuff doesn't leave me with a tangible product that I can admire when I'm done. At best, I just don't get bothered by people with problems. If I've done my job right, the only thing I get is a lack of things to do... Although this is the best job I've ever had, now and then I do miss the jobs where I had a finished product I (and others) could admire.

  26. @ Matt ~ Yes, you caught the spirit of the thing. I was a labor union rep for years - would you like to talk about the career with no concrete, tangible results for awhile? Although I had a young baby and a job that ate up 18 hours a day, I took up jigsaw puzzles, because . . . . they are finally completed and one can see the results.